I have a friend who is in a toxic relationship. I’ll call her Julia. Now Julia and her husband both profess to be Christians. They have been married for several years. But their relationship is, well, awful.
Julia and I talk fairly regularly and she cycled from worrying about what will happen next — to despairing over her situation — to relief when things work out — to euphoria when she acknowledges God as the untangler of her issues — and then back to worrying again etc.
More than anything, Julia wants her relationship to be Christ-centered and healthy. But it continues to spiral.
What do you say to a person in this situation? On the one hand, she wishes she could leave. But on the other hand, she truly loves her husband and she chooses to hang on.
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
Hebrews 12:1-3 NIV
Here are some things I can show Julia in Scripture about holding on.
- Remember those who have gone on before you. What words of encouragement might they tell you as you struggle? Can you hear your grandmother’s kind voice? How about your favorite teacher or coach?
- Get rid of the weights that slow you down and confess the sin that ties you up in knots.
- Run the marathon of life with stick-to-it-iveness.
- Remember that you are not alone.
- Consider the fact that Jesus was persecuted and ridiculed and falsely accused and murdered by people who had at one time been his followers so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
And based on Matthew 28:20, Jesus is with his believers always, to the very end of the age. We are not running this race alone. We are encouraged, strengthened and sometimes carried by our Lord and Savior, himself.
My friend, Julia, is not unlike you or me or countless Christians today who struggle with difficulties, obstacles, discouragement, chaos or pain. We need to encourage and pray for each other. And remember:
We are not walking alone.
We are walking with Jesus.
LORD, May we live our lives victoriously, realizing that you are with us all along the way.
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