The Natural Response

Dealing With Hurt Feelings

What is the natural response to having had your feelings hurt?

After polling a few people with this question, these are some of the responses that I got. 

• It makes me angry. 
• Sometimes I hurt them back. 
• Usually I take it all in and try to push it down. 
• Sometimes I believe what they say. I know I shouldn't, but I do. 
• I usually just get depressed. 
• Forget them. 
• I don't know if this is a coping mechanism or not, but I usually tell my friends how much this person hurt me and get them to take my side. 
• Sometimes I feel like God is doing this to me and I get mad at Him. 

Is there any Biblical basis for these responses?  Here are a few references that I found today.  What do you think? Does the Bible support the above responses?

• James 1:20  Human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.
• Romans 12:19  Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written (Deut 32:35): "It is mine to avenge: I will repay," says the Lord.  
• Proverbs 22:10  Fools show their annoyance at once, but the prudent overlook an insult.
• The Book of Job  (My summary: Don't listen to those guys. They have no idea what they are talking about!)
• Proverbs 16:28  A perverse person stirs up conflict, and a gossip separates close friends.
• I John 4:10  This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.

So, then, what should our response be when we are hurt by the insults of others?

Tomorrow we'll look at what Scripture says.

Lord, help me not to react impulsively when someone hurts my feelings. Help me not to internalize it. Help me to recognize your love for me in spite of how I might feel.